Discovering the Good
by Maroux
Summary: Ziva and Tony take advantage of their time off by taking a road trip, discovering adventure and beauty along the way. Told from Ziva's POV. TIVA, Season 10 spoilers and some mature content to be expected, will be multi chapter; occurs after 'Damned if You Do'.
1. Chapter 1 - Routine

Description: Ziva and Tony take advantage of their time off by taking a road trip, discovering adventure and beauty along the way. Told from Ziva's POV. TIVA, Season 10 spoilers and some mature content to be expected; occurs after 'Damned if You Do'. My first fiction based on a scene I couldn't get out of my head. My goal is to update weekly as I need something to do to fill this hiatus. Read, comment, suggest, review if you like.

Disclaimer: NCIS and the wonderful characters of the show are the property of CBS. I do not own these characters, I have simply borrowed them for my own creative purposes.

**Chapter 1 – Routine**

Washington DC – Early June

The alarm buzzed at 5:00 a.m. I had tried to accept the fact that it was no longer necessary for me to rouse at such an hour, but I know myself too well. Habit is habit. This whole resignation 'plan' was more difficult than I had imagined, and Tony was right, I was anxious for the outcome. I patted my night stand clumsily for my phone and peered out of my right eye at the bright screen. It was a Friday, one missed text message.

Run?

I closed my eyes and exhaled. The message had been sent from Brian, apparently at 4 am. I had always deemed myself an early bird, but compared to him, I was a late riser. We met at the gym a few years ago when he had been paired as my sparing opponent. He was my height and wiry, but he and his right hook were not to be underestimated. He had an inner strength and determination. I think that is why I liked him so much, respected him. I opened my eyes and blinked a couple of times, adjusting once again to the light.

6. Foggy bottom metro

The room shifted as I sat up and swung my legs out from under the covers. I closed my eyes waiting for the head rush to pass… _that was definitely too fast_. My toes and ankles cracked as I flexed and circled them, and when I stood up to awaken the rest of my body, I was reminded of a very angry muscle on the side of my neck. _Thank you, Tony's couch. Thank you, Tony. _Rubbing my neck, I couldn't help but smile thinking of the night before.

* * *

He had called at roughly 10 pm. I placed down my book and against my better judgment, answered the phone, "Hello Tony".

"Shalom Zee-VAH", he slurred. I could hear muted conversations in the background, he obviously was not at his apartment. "Where are you Tony?".

"Well Ziva, that is a good question. Jack Nicholson marathon at the State Theater, free beer."

I snapped my fingers twice, "Oh, Nicholson, I know Nicholson! You Can't Handle The Lies!"

He audibly sighed, "Truth. It's 'You can't handle the truth… A Few Good Men."

I laughed, "Well what do I know Tony, I read books."

"Well if anything, my darling little Israeli, I need to take you to more movies. Possibly more dinners as well."

I smiled to myself "Have you been drinking?" He was amusing and this situation was somewhat of a first. Rarely, did I ever see Mr. Anthony DiNozzo out of sorts.

Silence. "Maybe just a little. Pick me up?" I could see his crooked smile through the phone and I knew it was useless to resist. I quickly put on jeans and a t-shirt and headed out the door.

When I arrived at the theater he sauntered up to my car and cracked open the passenger side, poking only his head through the door, "Here's Johnny!".

"Tony I did not agree to give Johnny a ride home, only you". His face fell and he dropped his head while muttering sarcastically, "It's okay Ziva, The Shining is only a classic."

He kept me smiling the rest of the car ride to his place as he recounted and quoted highlights from the films. Movies. I understood better than anyone, perhaps even Tony. They were his release, he found comfort in them. When we got to his apartment, I walked him upstairs. Every time I was there, I found myself with conflicting emotions. Months ago, shortly after I lost my father, it was where I had spent a few days wracked with thoughts of grief and revenge. But as of late, slowly, it was becoming a place that held some familiarity to me, some comfort, a reminder of my new family, people whom I love and trust.

As we walked through the door, I stopped and took in my surroundings. He had re-arranged, something was off. He noticed my silence, "So do you like the new set up?".

"It is different… you have moved your couch."

He walked up behind me slowly and gently placed his hands on my shoulders. A shiver ran up my back, every hair on my body electrified, acutely aware of his proximity. I could feel his breath near my ear and I could swear he smelled my hair before whispering, "Very observant. I think the best place to take it in is from its new location". He walked me over to the couch and guided me into a sitting position. I was enjoying this forward, flirtatious Tony, it was refreshing. After spending so many years dancing around each other at a stand still, it was nice to spend time with one another without feeling the emotional burden of the job. As he joined me on the couch, he kept his right arm around my waist. "You know Ziva, I think we need a change of scenery. I think we need to get away from DC, let things settle." Was he sensing my own anxiety at our current situation? I looked into his green eyes and saw he was being serious. "What do you have in mind?" Without blinking, he replied, "Road Trip."

I shook my head, "No – definitely not Tony". He dropped his head back and closed his eyes. "C'mon Ziva, it could be fun..." he trailed off.

I looked away and chuckled, "Tony, the two of us in a confined space for the better part of two weeks, well… I can only imagine the arguments, teasing, annoying movie references…" _Who am I kidding, these are also things I love about him. _I turned back to find him asleep. He looked so relaxed and content. I was surprised to find myself reaching for him. I brushed a stray couple of hairs from his forehead and trailed down past his cheek and over his light stubble. _Tony if you only knew how much I care about you, so much so that it scares me. _ I laid my head on his shoulder and fell asleep memorizing the feeling of his arm around me, his hand resting lightly on my hip.

* * *

I had woken a couple of hours later, and found my way back home to my own bed. As much as I loved laying with Tony, I was not sure it was something I wanted to confront at this moment. Dressed, I glanced once more at my phone. I am sure I will hear from Tony at some point this afternoon, once he is able to process the previous night's events or get over his headache. For now though, I am more than happy to find my own release through a good run.

Familiar routines are not always such a bad thing to rely on when so much is uncertain.


	2. Chapter 2 - Idle Hands

Description: Ziva and Tony take advantage of their time off by taking a road trip, discovering adventure and beauty along the way. Told from Ziva's POV. TIVA, Season 10 spoilers and some mature content to be expected; occurs after 'Damned if You Do'. My first fiction based on a scene I couldn't get out of my head. My goal is to update weekly as I need something to do to fill this hiatus. Read, comment, suggest, review if you like.

**PS – Thanks to all of those who have followed or reviewed!**

Disclaimer: NCIS and the wonderful characters of the show are the property of CBS. I do not own these characters, I have simply borrowed them for my own creative purposes.

**Chapter 2 – Idle Hands**

"Dead marine, grab your gear?"

These five words abruptly greeted me as I opened the apartment door.

"Too soon? I'm sorry. Coffee?" he lifted two cups from Starbucks.

The gesture brought a smile to my face. "Actually Tony, I am oddly comforted by the combination of that phrase and the smell of coffee." _Very Gibbs_.

He tilted his head slightly and looked off to the side, "Huh… now that I think about it, so am I. The only thing missing is a good head slap." After a moment in thought, he turned his attention back to me and took in my appearance, "Were you running?"

"As a matter of fact, Tony, I was out with Brian. We ran the riverfront."

"Ah, Brian. Brown hair, short, walks with a limp?"

I let out a short laugh and internally winced at the memory. "Yes and yes and the limp was only temporary. He received that injury during one of our more … intense … sparring sessions. He has since recovered."

* * *

I remembered that night well. EJ had re-emerged and she, along with Tony, were on their way to the safe house. The trap had been set for Stratton; all we had to do was wait. McGee had left an hour ago, but for some reason, I couldn't leave my desk. There was nothing for me to do at home, nothing to relieve my anxiety.

In the dim evening light of the office, I glanced at Tony's empty chair. He was perfectly capable of handling this assignment, of handling EJ. Perhaps some time alone would be good for them. After all, they had many things to discuss… especially after how she left. I hope he treads lightly. After putting himself back together, I would hate to see him broken after she leaves again. But everything would be fine; he was past this, over her… _right?_ Yes, this was good, give them this space to talk… alone… _hmm... don't go down this road Ziva, __this is dangerous, uncharted territory._

Gibbs broke the silence from his desk, "Ziver, go home."

"I would prefer to stay here, if that is alright." I sighed and stole another glance at Tony's desk.

"He's fine. You should get some rest." Nothing gets by Gibbs.

"I am not tired, and I cannot go home, not with Stratton so close." _Not to mention the fact that I would pace a hole into my living room carpet._

"Well, go somewhere. I can't hear myself think over the tapping of that pencil."

Puzzled, I looked down at my hand. _How did that get there? _Was I completely oblivious to the repetitive rapping of my pencil against my keyboard? Gibbs was right, I needed to find some outlet for whatever it was I was feeling. With a nod in his direction, I took my exit.

The gym had been my second thought, the first was to go and provide Tony with some back up. _Don't be foolish._

As I wrapped my hands, I could think of nothing else. EJ and Tony alone. _You are jealous_. I shook the thought from my head. "It is not jealousy, it is simply concern." I tried to convince myself under my breath. _Perhaps she will stay this time; maybe they could make it work? _Unlikely.

"Ziva, you in?" Brian motioned to the center mat from across the room.

I nodded to Brian, secured my padding and met him in the taped off ring. We began circling, waiting for the other to throw the first jab. I shuffled right and cut left immediately avoiding his first attack.

_Or maybe you are bothered because Ray has not called. He had promised to stay in touch. _I threw my right hook and missed by inches. Brian took the opportunity from the slip up to grab hold of my left leg and flipped me onto the mat. I quickly scrambled to my feet in a defensive stance. Focus. Focus.

_What was so damn important that he could not pick up the phone and call the woman he 'loved'? _Brian easily avoided my uppercut and landed a blow to my ribs. The pain was welcomed, a mental distraction.

I bit down on my mouth guard and shook my head, trying to silence my unrelenting mind. _Does Ray know the number of nights you sat by, idly waiting for a call, an e-mail, a text? Craving some communication to let you know that you mattered to him… to someone?_

Brian landed two consecutive hits and a knee to my stomach. I was gasping for breath and my eyes stung as my sweat ran down my face. Get back up; focus.

_Or are you upset because deep down you know you are settling… settling for a man who does not appreciate you. Settling because the one person you have ever felt something meaningful with is unattainable to you, forbidden, and slipping away from you with each passing minute in that safe house with her._

It all became too much. The thoughts of Ray, my own feelings of inadequacy, the jealousy, the fear of losing Tony. I lunged at Brian, emotionally throwing punch after punch. I lost control and he could not react quickly enough. I threw all of my weight into my roundhouse; the kick connected to the side of his knee and he fell to the floor.

It took me a few seconds to realize what had just happened as he rolled on the floor. After some choice words and a few deep breaths, he was able to stand, albeit not well. He had walked around the mat, wincing occasionally, trying to recover his pride; he did not fall to opponents often.

A few nights later after EJ's departure and my inevitable break from Ray, Brian had met Tony and I out for drinks. I owed him at least one for being the recipient of the physical manifestation of my troubled mind.

That fight was a wake up call; I was out of control. I course corrected the only way I knew how: denial and suppression. Business as usual.

* * *

"Well Forrest, are you going to let me in or are you just going to stand there staring at the floor until you can see through it?" He tipped his head forward to peer over his sunglasses.

I met his eyes and coyly smiled, "Only because you brought coffee."

I stepped aside and followed him in. He was wearing an old Ohio State Hooded sweatshirt with jeans. Red looked nice on him.


End file.
